Being selfish means taking care of ourselves first.
And we can see this in all living things. We are all naturally born selfish because it's part of our survival mechanism.
For example, when puppies are born they push and shove their brothers and sister to get to their mothers milk. And when plants grow to take up the light, they do it even if they take the light away from other plants. They are taking care of themselves first because if they didn't they wouldn't survive.
Why we believe being selfish is “bad” is because we believe being selfish means only taking care of ourselves to the determent of others. And because of this belief, we've turned selfishness into something that it's not.
When puppies selfishly push and shove to get their mothers milk, once they have it they don't continue to push and shove. Their goal isn't to have all of the milk for themselves but to only take what they need and leave the rest for others.
Being selfish is about taking care of ourselves first. But that doesn't mean we don't take care of others. It means we first take care of ourselves and, once we've done that, we can then take care of others second if we want.
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